Howard Stern - Tortured Man

Artist: Howard Stern
Music Album: Howard Stern Private Parts The Album
(Music Song Lyrics):
Ladies and Gentlemen, I will now bring you one of the greatest vertuosos of
our time

A radio star, I hate my TV
My life is on film, yet it sucks being me
(Shut up, sit down)
My life's a wreck, I'm bored with sex
I've go a big nose and a skinny neck
I can't sing, I can't dance
I make money to talk about the junk in my under pants

I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I can't beleive I am who I am
I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I can't beleive I am who I am

(I told you not to be stupid you moron)
(Shut up, sit down)
(Oh, oh, oh)
(Bababooey)
(Oh, that's good)
(He, he, he, he, he)
When Terri Hatcher was on my show
She came onto me, I was tempted to go
Heather Locklear, she thinks I'm great
I would bet my life I could get her on the first date
Courtney Love, Madonna, and Sharon Stone
I could get them all together and make each one moan
Tammy, Raquel, Carmen, Jenny Macarthy, Demi, I mean Demi
(He, he, he, he, he)

I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I can't beleive I am who I am

I like my farts, I'm immature
They say I'm great, but I'm not sure
My whole life sucks, each minute blows
This gangely body, this monsterous nose
This droopy ass, this tiny shween
No wonder I get on the air and act so mean
I wish my life were much more simple
I've got a wookie the size of a pimple

I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I can't beleive I am who I am
I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I can't beleive I am who I am

I'm a tortured man
(I think so)
I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
I'm a tortured man
(Shut up, sit down)
I'm a tortured man
(I told you not to be stupid you moron)
(I'm just thinking for a minute, should I trade half my money
for ten times as much sex?)
(It's an equation from hell)
(Oh, that's good)
(It's an equation from hell)
(Oh)
(It's an equation from hell)
(Oh, that's good)
(It's an equation from hell)
(Oh
Howard Stern lyrics, Howard Stern Tortured Man lyrics, Howard Stern Tortured Man mp3 song
Howard Stern Tortured Man

Howard Stern - I Went The Gay Way

Artist: Howard Stern
Music Album: Unknown
(Music Song Lyrics):
I WENT THE GAY WAY...By The Backside Boys
(Listed below are the lyrics to Howard Stern's
song parody of the Backstreet Boys'
"I Want It That Way", which was first performed on 9/27/99)

Opening Music

Howard Stern singing:
This song.. makes me cry, makes me crave.. a man's backside.
Every time I hear this dumb song played, I feel like I'm gay.
I watch.. the telly While Ralph.. shaves my belly.
People wonderin' if I'm still straight.. am I going gaaayhey?
Tell me why.. this song makes my butt ache.
Tell me why.. homo love could be a mistake.
Men's backside's are a dirty place.
Could I go the gay way?

Fred Norris singing:
Jackie.. bend ooover, and bark loud.. like Ro-ver..
Would K.C. be my love sla-ave? If I went the gay way.

Howard Stern singing:
Get K-Y!.. I'm singin' like a sissy.
Get K-Y!.. Ralph come and smell my butt cheeks.
Get K-Y!.. I'm thinkin' 'bout the ballet
Could I go the gay way?

Fred Norris singing:
Will there be pain, that I can not explain, what's coming over me?
If I start to resist, please don't use fist, or I might need some surgery!

Howard Stern singing:
I watch.. the telly.. while Ralph.. shaves my belly.

Homo.. homo.. homo.. homo.. homo.. With every passing day!

Howard Stern singing:
Get K-Y!.. Would I like to see a sphincter?
Get K-Y!.. No smell is more distincter!
Get K-Y!.. I wonder what my wife would saaaaaay!
If I went the gay way!

Get K-Y!.. sphincter, sphincter, sphincter, sphincter!
Get K-Y!.. Di-stincter, stincter, stincter!
Get K-Y!.. Oh, Fred I need your sphincter!
Get K-Y!.. Give me K.C.'s it's more distincter!
Get K-Y!.. I wonder what my wife would saaaaaay!

If I went the gay way!

If I..went the gay way
Howard Stern lyrics, Howard Stern I Went The Gay Way lyrics, Howard Stern I Went The Gay Way mp3 song
Howard Stern I Went The Gay Way